by Marianne van Katwijk
More Divorce due to Corona
Why we need to change in lockdown
Lock down not only forced us to stay inside the house. It also forced us to look inside ourselves.
Being shown the truth about how we feel in our relationships.
Statistics show that there will be more divorces due to the Corona. They predict one third more
divorces than normal.
Pre-Covid we could run, hide, ignore our true feelings. By keeping ourselves busy, by hiding in our
work, by numbing the feelings on the weekends. And indulge in shopping for new clothes, make up
and what more.`
Lockdown forced us to look at ourselves and forced us to see all that has been working and all that
has not been working, without being able to take a break by going to the gym, or meeting up with
friends. We have been forced to deal with it on our own.
Many, many women, have seen what they have been ignoring for a very long time now. That there
are many things that are not going the way they really desire. Ignoring their own needs, ignoring
their own desires. Not speaking up to keep the good atmosphere.
Being at home and being locked down with the whole family without being able to take time off,
without being able to find distraction in work, without face to face emotional and spiritual support
from sisters. Suddenly all the things we have been hiding, we have been ignoring, we have been
pushing away as not so important, or as “that’s just the way it is”, have been coming to the surface
and slapped us in the face.
We noticed that being a mother, being a business woman, being a partner, being a lover, being a
friend and now also being a school teacher is too much! We are tired…
Running things in a patriarchal way is draining women. It is sucking the life out of us.
We are cyclical beings, who are aligned with the rhythms of the moon, when we try to block this flow
and work like men, like the patriarchal structure we live in, we deny a part of us that brings us our
power and radiance. Our own life force energy.
So many women have told me the past few months since the beginning of the lockdown that they
are tired, that they are unhappy, that they don’t feel loved, don’t feel appreciated. That they feel
they are being taken for granted, that they have been in a relationship and yet they feel they have
still been really ALONE!
Taking care of the kids, running the family, making sure to do fun things for the kids, planning the
weekends, cooking, laundry, grocery shopping, cleaning, extra school lessons at home, and now in
corona time also being the school teacher, and at the same time running your own business from
Where is the romance? Where is the real happy ending? Where is that fairytale where Prince
Charming is your companion, helping, being with us, giving compliments and gifts and kisses under
the moon light or in front of the fire place? Being together like one heart.
We have been walking around like Cinderella, hoping for a fairy to come and safe us so we can finally
be part of the magical ball, and dancing with our Prince.
How did this happen? How did we get here? It’s not our fault, but neither is it the fault of our men!
We have been conditioned for thousands of years. Women have been repressed for thousands of
years. Not specifically by men but by the system! Patriarchy.
Our social, cultural and familial conditioning has primed us how to behave. We women have not
spoken up and letting our men know clearly what we need and want and why, and STAND for our
needs and choices. Most of us woman don’t even know what it is we really want, yet still we can feel
that inner yearning, that inner longing, that inner whisper…something is off…I don’t feel happy.
Our men have not been able to hear us, not seen and felt what is our true desire and needs. Men
have been under the spell of conditioning too, so in this way we all keep things in place.
We have been told to be a good girl, that a successful marriage is one that lasts a life time. That we
have to give, give, give, and then it will work and we will have our happy ending. We have made to
belief. We have been told we don’t matter, that we are never good enough (take one look at the
commercials for women and you know what I mean). We have been told our pleasure is not for us.
And if we do we a sluts, bitches, whores, and witches.
But now is the time women start to wake up, and start seeing they are not happy, they are not living
their happy ending. We want change, and most of us have been feeling guilty for feeling this!
Covid has been pushing us to look at ourselves, to look at our relationships to look at what it is we
Now is the time to take a stand for our true soul desires and to connect to our ovaries. We don’t
need balls to take the step, we have our ovaries! Much less sensitive and more powerful than balls,
and it is time we start seeing ourselves for what we truly are!
Powerful beings that carry within our bodies the creative force of the universe! As long as we don’t
stand for what we desire, for the change we long to experience in our relationships, then our men
will never change with us and things will stay the way they are.
Just as we are now slowly coming out of lockdown and stepping into a new world, it is time we slowly
let ourselves come out of the lock down we have been in in our relationships. It is time we
consciously create the new world we want to experience, the life we desire to live! It is time to listen
to the whispers of our soul!
We can do this! Yes, it takes some ovaries, but know you are not alone!
So many women feel exactly like you!
A successful relationship is not one that lasts a life time. One you complete until death do us part,
but we have both been unhappy.
Choosing for a divorce does not equal failure. A divorce allows you the space, the stepping stone for
a better life. It teaches you to finally take care of yourself and the importance of self-care. It gifts you
the space to listen to your soul desires.
A successful relationship is one where you can both see; We are not feeling happy, let’s step out of it
so we can both open our eyes and see this for what it really is. A chance for a better life, where we
can all gift ourselves a new way of living. A chance to live the life of our dreams!
Now is the time! Now is the time for the new-normal!! A new-normal we consciously can
Be brave my sisters and brothers and listen to the whispers of your heart and soul!
You are the ones that bring the new-normal and our relationship is the center of this new-normal!
We can choose to bring love and magic in our relationships. Even if it means we choose for a divorce.
You can have a better relationship with each other than when you were married.
Giving up a shared house and a bed for being better people – that’s as big a win as you can get!
Marianne van Katwijk
Female Sacred Sex Coach